the soundtrack of my life…

Archive for January 2008

Rather than worrying about pleasing someone who may be impossible to please, stay focused on your own desires and needs.


I am only one woman.

I want to be happy

I have dyslexia, for real.

I wish I had enough money to repay my mom for everything she’s ever given me.

I hate fake people.

I fear something happening to my mom.

I hear dead people, lol. Wait that was I see dead people…dah well.

I search for new music on a constant basis.

I wonder what my future holds.

I regret not telling them how I was feeling…

I love my inner circle.

I ache after dance class.

I always think about 3 people.

I usually keep my feelings bottled up.

I am not perfect.

I dance in front of my bathroom mirror all the time.

I sing loudly in the car.

I never like sitting in traffic.

I rarely get lost.

I cry in the middle of the night.

I am not always right, even though I hate to admit it.

I lose my mind periodically.

I’m confused when I talk to certain people.

I need to be accepted.

I should stop blaming myself when things go wrong.

If your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be?

  1. Open your music library
  2. Put it on shuffle
  3. Press play
  4. For every question, type the song that’s playing
  5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

Opening Credits: Love Poems by Bilal

Waking Up: La Foto Se Me Borro by Elvis Crespo

Average Day: Mirror in the Sky by K-Os

First Date: Cupid’s Chokehold by Gym Class Heroes

Falling in Love: Is It Good To You by Heavy D and the Boyz

Love Scene: Luv Songs by The Dream

Fight Scene: Dame Un Momento by The D.E.Y.

Breaking Up: Hollywood Divorce by Outkast featuring Lil Wayne and Snoop Dogg

Getting Back Together: Have You Seen Her by Donell Jones

Secret Love: Brain by NERD

Life’s Okay: Character by Van Hunt

Mental Breakdown: Beef by Notorious B.I.G. featuring Mobb Deep

Driving: Bravebird by Amel Larrieux

Learning a Lesson: Let It Be by Jill Scott

Deep Thought: Without You by Kem

Flashback: Best Friend by Brandy

Partying: Dope Jam/Gangsta Gangsta by Backyard Band

Happy Dance: Good Clothes by Little Brother

Regretting: Rumors by Timex Social Club

Long Night Alone: F*** Me Pumps by Amy Winehouse

Death Scene: Stop Callin’ Me by Dem Franchize Boyz

Closing Credits: Without You by J. Holiday

Here’s a couple more for you…
“Tell Me (I’ll Be Around)” by Shades
“Just Ask Me To” by Tevin Campbell

Recently I’ve been having some problems catching my 40 winks. Anyone who knows me knows that is never the case, but apparently I’ve got a lot on my mind…

  • I need a part-time job…ASAP
  • I have talk with my mom about some things…will it put a damper on next weekend?
  • Will I get a response from my father?
  • I need to order a transcript and start on my application.
  • What am I going to take with me to Ft. Lauderdale next week?
  • I hope that Cris and Pooh are going to be okay…
  • I should stop bullsh!ttin’ on everything…
  • Am I really that intimidating?

I’ve been in a very nostalgic mood recently…from looking at old pictures to catching up with old friends to listening to random music from my childhood. Here are a few songs (and artists) that were my favorites back in the day and I almost forgot about…

These girls could SANG! “Why Can’t You Come Home?” by Ex-Girlfriend

Me and my cousins used to make up dance routines to this song…ha ha ha “Your Sweetness” by The Good Girls

Do you remember Tia and Tamara Mowry’s group??? (What happened to the 2 other girls??) “Yeah Yeah Yeah” by Voices

I used to love this song! “Bug-A-Boo” by Ed O.G. & Da Bulldogs

What were some of the artists and songs you remember from the late 80s and early 90s? What ever happened to groups like Perfect Gentleman, Today, The Good Girls, Ex-Girlfriend, and Blackgirl?

I’m really starting to think I am…

In the past 5 years, I’ve gotten rid of bunch of “friends.”  Some of them genuinely hurt me, but, I’ll admit, that there a few that I just didn’t feel like putting in the effort with them anymore.  Even recently, I find myself feeling rather indifferent when people do things that get on my nerves.  Hell, just the other day, I felt myself ready to write yet another person off.  I stopped myself before I said, or didn’t say, something that I might regret in the future.

 I swear it seems like everytime I talk to or run into someone I haven’t spoken to or seen in more than 2 months, I have yet ANOTHER situation that starts of “yeah, you know I don’t talk to <insert name here> anymore…”  I always get the same reaction “DAMN! What happened?” followed by a nervous chuckle.  I think that  people are thinking to themselves, her she goes again — cutting someone else off.  For real, I know it looks like I’m the one at fault and there HAS to be something wrong with me because I can’t keep a friend to save my life.

I find that I blame myself because the only constant is me…I think I’m better at keeping friends if I can get over the 5 year trial period.  My closest friends are people I’ve known forever — 23 years, 14 years, 10 years, 8 years, 7 years, and 6 years.

I’m feeling bad because it’s like I don’t care anymore…almost as if you aren’t sh!t until after year 5.  Now this isn’t the way it is across the board, there have been a few execptions to the rule.  But it really seems to be a growing trend for me…

For the people in my life who haven’t haven’t made it to year 5 yet, I really hope that I don’t do anything to you to ruin your chances of making it to the 5th anniversary… 

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Days of my Life

January 2008
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