the soundtrack of my life…

The Reason

Posted on: March 26, 2009

They say that people come into you life for a reason. A year ago, after 27 years of not being present, my father came into my life. Soon followed by my brothers, step-mom, sister-in-law and nephew. I wondered to myself “why”. I didn’t have the answer then and I don’t have the answer now. What I do know is that this introduction has been the best thing that has ever happened to my life. Meeting my family has put so much into perspective. And now so even more.

Last week, I found out that my father sick. When he told me, I was devastated. He just sounded so weak and sad when he delivered the news to me, but the one thing he said that brought him joy and happiness (and I could hear it in his voice) was the fact that my brothers and I were bonding and building a relationship with each other. It made him feel like everything will be alright, no matter what happens. At that moment, every emotion came rushing at me – and I broke down. Seeing him on Saturday, thinner than our last visit, was hard. His spirits just weren’t what they once were. I could tell my step-mom was stressed but she tried not to show it.

For most of the day Sunday, I was preety much out of it. Deep in thought, thinking about so much and so little all at the same time. That is, until I checked my voicemail. My dad called to say that things didn’t look as bad as his doctor originally thought. He is still sick, but thank God for an early diagnosis. I’ll find out more on his treatment plan this weekend.

My dad being sick has made me realize that they is a reason for everything that happens in life, sometimes the answer will be reavealed, and sometimes it’s not. But you just have to trust that God knows what he’s doing.

Be blessed and have a great weekend!

– Boog

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3 Responses to "The Reason"

Hugs. You KNOW I know what you mean. It’s amazing all the love that has come into your world by you making the courageous first step to write to your father. You put forth your love of self and got love back tenfold. Can’t nobody take that away from ya!

~~~~~~ right back ‘atcha! I would’ve never thought that I would be in this place a year ago when before I wrote the letter. I think about that every time I see or talk to my dad, step-mom, brothers, nephew & sister-in-law. I can honestly say I’m in a better place than I’ve ever been before.

I felt some type of way when I found out my dad passed away. At that point, he had only been in my life for 3 years and I felt like I did before the first time I saw him.

Anyways, your dad is definitely right homie. Be grateful for the time you guys have because certain people will NEVER get that time with one or both of their biological parents. Opening up to people and especially to family can be hard. But it’s always a worthwhile experience.

If you want to talk, you have the #.

Thanks B. I’m definitely grateful for the opportunity to spend time with them, and I am sure to tell my dad that whenever I talk to him. I know things could’ve been a lot different and the last year wouldn’t have been filled with the same milestones. I thank the Lord for this blessing everyday.

God do knows what’s he’s doing, I haven’t seen my father in over 22-25yrs and the last I heard from him he was married to a Asian woman and she never wanted us to talk and guess what we never did, my Aunt seen him in 2007 walking into a store and he asked how I was doing and he gave her his number, I was excited!
he told my aunt, that he was sick with cancer and he was living in Canada, directing a movie or something. I called the number, a voice mail came on and I lefted a message, so I must have called for a couple of days, until I said forget it and one day I decided to call again and his Asian wife answer the phone and she told me he wasn’t there and she would tell him to call me and guess what he never called. I just lefted it alone!

So, that’s wonderful that you are able to see and connect with your father, his wife and your brother.

I wish I can at least see my father:-)

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